Since I can't think of suitable flippancy...

I'll let this do the job instead



From Mostly safe for work

Back in saddle

Not that anybody gives a rats fuck but real life has kind of got in the way of talking shite on here. If I cared enough I'd apologise. But I don't.

Back to business - what has caught my eye this week?? This little corker for a starters:

"The government could have to bail out Private Finance Initiative projects to the tune of £4bn in the next 18 months, an industry spokesman has warned."

What the fuck?? What the fucking fuck was that???

The government could have to bail out Private Finance Initiative projects to the tune of £4bn

Hang on a fucking minute - PFI works in 2 ways
1) the government transfer its assets like buildings over to PFI companies, pay the companies a ridiculous amount of wonga to run them, so the company has asset plus income. Or
2) The government pays a PFI company a ridiculous figure per year to supply them with a school, prison or hospital, getting thoroughly shafted into the the bargain and saddling the taxpayer with a 25 year-ish bill

So the PFI company is quids in - and lets not forget that at the height of the PFI bubble big companies were fighting like rats in a sack to get their lips round the governments teet - but yet when itall looks to go tits up they have the brass fucking balls to come back to the trough wanting bail-outs and more cash making .

The whole point of PFI is that the private sector take the risk in return for a huge wad of cash. Not take the cash in return for a taxpayer bailout if things get rocky.
Fuckers. Words fail me; especially when I end up agreeing with the fucking Lib Dems and their school of wolly thinking

"We need to be very careful about the taxpayer taking all the risks and the private partners taking all the benefits," (Vince Cable)

In other news, Lord Mandelson of Bum swears at a coffee retailer after they have the temerity criticise the state of our tattered economy. Bless

Green really is the new Nazism

With scorn poured on it from most angles and in far more elequent / sweary terms than I can; I probably should just leave it at calling Jonathon Porritt a vile fucker, who should fuck off back to whatever stone he crawled out from under rather than suckling from the carbon-producing taxpayers teet (the hypocritical bastard).

You are free to do as we tell you

"I think we will work our way towards a position that says that having more than two children is irresponsible" - Herr Porritt

Porritt is chair of The Optimum Population Trust (a charity, 'natch) - who seem to want to encourage the limiting of the population by whatever means possible (though I suspect being a bunch of tree-hugging lefties it won't include concepts such as placing theoretical caps on annual immigration as that's beyond the pale for most lefties - it's easier to harrang the existing population)

Porritt, a former chairman of the Green party, says the government must improve family planning, even if it means shifting money from curing illness to increasing contraception and abortion

Thus we have the invention of a new reason to abort "I'm savin' the environment innit". I wonder how they will square the circle of respecting cultural diversity (where cultures dictate large families) and saving the planet - but doubtless the catholics will be fair game.
He also seems to advocate letting people die to save the planet. Cunt

Good money after bad

Jesus wept.



Having spunked 37 billion up the wall bailing out feckless bankers and having seen it totally fail; what does the dear leader do??

You guessed it - He announces he'll spunk another 10+ billion (probably, and at least) of our money up the wall bailing out yet more feckless bankers and failed financial institutions from their own incompetence and greed.

What an absolute sackless shite we have as a leader

Newcastle Council are a bunch of Twats

The idiotic Lib Dem shitehawks who run Newcastle council have decided that they will use my taxes to spunk up the wall on Keynesian spending plans including "Regeneration projects" (Pikey builders putting shitty double glazing and loft lagging into the houses of the workshy), "Raising benefits" (again for the workshy / lazy) and "Pensions" (doubtless gold-plating the ones of the overpaid fuckers leading the council on 100+K a year).

Utter, utter bastards - what should my heard earned pay be blown on feather-bedding the bastards who already get the moon on a fucking stick. Why can't they get their pitiful brains round the concept that you cannot spend your way out of a recession by taxing the working stiffs - possibly because they nicked the idea from central government (doubtless on the logic that if the Gorgon is screwing the country rotten propping up failed banks, no-one will notice if they follow his lead), and partially because the Lib Dems are at risk of getting the boot at the next local elections if they're not seen to make sure the fat and lazy get their council tax benefits and free sauna sessions.

The only rays of hope are that they'll spend some of the money on improving the absolutely shoddy road network up here (though the amount of work they'll get out of 7 mil won't be much based on the time it took them to widen 200 meters of road by 8 meters - 6 fucking months) and sacking some 500 diversity caseworkers and organic beansprout advisers.

Happily though in the interests of interactivity I was able to tell them what a bunch of twats they were via their "what do you think of our budget" feedback page on the website. But I doubt they'll listen

Shame (Part 2)

Oh what a pity this happened: -

Jug eared child killer Sean Mercer got a good kicking over Christmas at HMP Moorland in Doncaster.

And I'm sure if we all listen carefully we can hear the sound of the smallest violin in the world striking up a tune just for poor little Sean.

A Prison Service spokeswoman said: "We can confirm an incident took place at HMP Moorland at 2.30pm on Saturday, December 27, in which two prisoners assaulted each other.

"The incident lasted less than two minutes and was quickly resolved by the timely intervention of staff."

And a tenner says that for about 1 minute 50 seconds of the incident, the prison staff were standing just round the corner, possibly counting the number of bricks in the wall.

Scumbag knows a few people who work as a prison guards and has been told a rather hearwarming story of some crim or the other, freshly delivered to prison after being found guilty of murdering some granny. The guards delivered him into a room containing other prisoners - who'd been tipped off about this fuckers arrival and the reasons behind his conviction - went out of the room, counted slowly to 100, went back into the room and dragged said crim out of the room and off to have his injuries treated.

Sean Mercer has 22 years of beatings to look forward to - some involving a pool cue no doubt.

Shame

Apparently George Galloway was "injured" yesterday during the protests yesterday

I do hope it was serious.

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Update: -

And here's a picture from yesterday that gives it all away, amusingly dwarfing the "Israel = terror" banner just behind it.

I expect to see all these people out in support of Zimbabwe, Darfur etc. Or maybe not

Whatever floats your boat Gordon

From the snot gobblers new year message

What keeps me up at night, and gets me up in the morning are the hopes and aspirations of the British people

I pity his wife.

Drunk In Charge of a Baby

These two vile specimens, Mark and Petra Tyler of Reindeer Street, Mansfield, have just been given a slap on the wrist for taking their 4 month old sprog out on a 7 hour piss-up.

The child was described by police as hungry and had a filthy bottle filled with sour milk in his pushchair.

Poor kid is probably lucky it didn't have a bottle full of wife-beater for sustenance.

As this photo shows they are full of remorse for their actions and a 2 year community order and a 60 quid fine (doubtless payable at some laughable rate like £2 per week) seems entirely appropriate.

Look in the dictionary for a definition of "Remorse"
- You'll find this photo

I can't find any information on what sort (if any) community service they'll have to do, but I doubt they'll get a lovely orange hi-viz jacket as it'll violate their human rights or some such nonsense. But on the off-chance anyone happens to be in Mark and Petra's neck of the woods and sees a bald ugly bloke and a fat bottle blonde in a shell-suit wearing a hi-viz, be sure to chuck a can or 2 at them.

Has anybody seen our nonces?

Fucking unbelievable

Fat Jacqui's band of plods appear to have "lost track" of 317 sex offenders in the past 12 months - no-one knows where they have fucked off to - I doubt it's for therapy.

So all those databases, all those rules, all those hi-tech systems that the home office buys, and once again they fuck up....

I fucking despair.

Dogs: - Gone to.....

If we ever needed proof that as a nation we are completely fucked, then this little gem of a story is another star witness in the case for the prosecution.

Thousands of the worst rapists and paedophiles can now seek to be taken off the sex offenders' register to protect their human rights.

It appears that 3 high court judges in their infinite wisdom have decided that nonces, rapists and other deviants have the right to challenge plods ability to keep tabs on them, and doubtless when they do some rat-faced weasel of a lawyer on the legal aid shilling will be able to convince a judge that it's against a nonces right to be prevented from living near a school.
So who are these brave upholders of the rights of nonces?

Lord Justice Latham, Mr Justice Underhill and Mr Justice Flaux

I was going to go off on some rant about how I hoped that these mongs get a nasty dose of karma down a darken alley; but I really can't work up the necessary head of steam after the week I've had. This country is utterly fucked as long as we stay beholden to idiot concepts like "universal human rights" for those who cannot understand the concept of "responsibilities". We are more than fucked - this sort of thing is the start of the breakdown of law and order as we know it - when the general population stop believeing in the rule of law, we get the dispensing of mob justice in its place - and the mob has a habit of being a lot less tolerent of the concept of human rights

Trots threaten to fuck up the post (again)

surprise fucking surprise - it's a busy time of the year and another group of the brothers threaten strike action. This time it's those serial wankers at the post office who have thrown a strop over plans to relocate some depots.

What gives these workshy bastards the right to walk out and try to hold the country to randsom at the slightest change to the way they work? Could it be the fact that the commercial workers union and its fellow comrades funding makes up 80% of labours income?

Last week, Coventry MP Jim Cunningham asked the government to step in to try to head off the potential strike by arranging talks between Royal Mail, MPs and unions

And is peacemaker Jim a labour MP? By a happy coincidence he is! Fancy that! So Jim wants to ensure his friends in the unions get their way, so he gets their votes, and his bosses get their funding. Everyone's a winner, except the taxpayer who prop up the royal mail, and the customer who's hostage to the trots.

Plod didn't lawfully kill a Brazillian Sparky

So, err - isn't that murder? The coroner did his best to toe the line and doubtless big-up his chances of getting a gong at the end of it, but those pesky jurors had other ideas - effectively saying that they thought the police evidence was shady - now where have we heard that before?

From the BBC:

• Did officers shout 'armed police'? NO
• Did Mr de Menezes move towards officers? NO
• Did difficulty in identifying the man under surveillance lead to his death? NO
• Did the behaviour of Mr de Menezes increasing suspicion among officers lead to his death? NO

Yet no rozzer seems to be prepared to be accountable - the appropriately named Cresidda Dick has been promoted(!) and that muppet Ian Blair was given the boot by Boris Johnson.
Those involved on the periphery also seem reluctant to call for heads to roll

Acting Met Commissioner Sir Paul Stephenson said Mr de Menezes' death had been a "most terrible mistake", which he "deeply regretted".

So will you ask for resignations then Paul?

Home Secretary Jacqui Smith said the death was "a profoundly shocking tragedy".

So will you be asking for resignations then Jacqui? - apparently not:

"What we have learnt from the accounts of the tragic events that day reminds us all of the extremely demanding circumstances under which the police work to protect us from further terrorist attack," she added.

So it's ok to kill someone, with no consequences, as long as the dog-whistle of "terrorist attacks" is used eh? I thought you said "if you have nothing to hide you have nothing to fear" Jacqui?

Yet some are even more shameless

Chief Constable Ken Jones, president of the Association of Chief Police Officers, said the officers were "breaking new ground in their determination to confront men believed to be intent on mass murder".

Or in this case shooting innocent sparkies - Tactless fucker.

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Update:
I note that that odious little trot Ken Livingstone has "praised" the useless Dick woman

"Cressida Dick is one of the most talented officers I have ever worked with," he said, adding that she had an "incredible record".

Can't the newt-lover just piss off back to whatever rock he crawled out from under, stay there and keep his idiotic ideas to himself. What a twat

I don't know which is worse...

The fuckers who raped her or the spineless bastards who ignored a 14 year old kid being snatched by a gang of 9 vile sub-humans.

She was told she should be raped for insulting their leader's girlfriend, and they laughed as they took turns

At some point in the years since I disembarked from the education system, they've obviously stopped teaching any sort of moral based education, since a group of 13-16 year olds think it's acceptable to rape a minor for "dissin' mi bitch, innit". These bastards deserve no mercy whatsoever when they get dropped off for a stretch in one of our fine holiday camps prisons.However, as we all know, since the legal system is run by the usual bleeding hearts apologists, they'll get 2 years at a young offenders institute, a new identity, benefits for life and 5 years counceling for the trauma of being held to account for something.

Having said all that, there's got to be a little bit of utter, complete, revulsion reserved for the spineless bastards who turned the other cheek as a young girl gets dragged off by a gang and raped.
As far as I'm concerned that's my fill of this country and plods lack of ability to keep it safe while the public closes its eyes to the evils perpetrated by the gaggles of feral youth every day of the week. I'm looking for a shotgun.